Worn By All of the Dust
by Anera527
Summary: Alec/Tess. Following the close of the Sandbrook case, Alec has one meeting with Tess that changes everything. Slightly AU ending. Companion piece to my fic 'Second Chances'.


" _ **Worn By All of the Dust"**_

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 _When the gusts came around to blow me down  
Held on as tightly as you held onto me  
Held on as tightly as you held onto me_

 _-To Build a Home,_ Cinematic Orchestra

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It was raining outside as Alec took apart the map that held all of Sandbrook within it. Miller's handiwork, he thought wryly, but there was a surprising spark of pride mixed in with that thought as well. She had been the deciding factor in solving the years'-old case, the one person who hadn't been terribly damaged by what she'd seen with it. Ellie Miller had come fully into her own; he hoped she would be able to keep it that way.

She was stronger than she supposed. He thought maybe she was realizing that.

The pictures of Pippa and Lisa were last to go into the box of old case files. He looked at them both with clearer eyes than he had the day before following the Ashworths' and Ricky's arrests, but the dull ache deep in his heart had not lessened. He had carried Pippa's weight too long and had wondered about Lisa's fate too often to let them go now. In some ways he carried them—and Danny Latimer— as closely as he did his daughter Daisy. The end of Sandbrook had given him absolution but it would never give him closure; he would carry them with him for the rest of his life.

Finally the box was closed and ready for storage; it would all need to be taken to the police quarters in Broadchurch for documentation as proof of what he and Miller had done to solve the case. Every bit of evidence was crucial and he would be damned before any of the three got off in trial.

Joe Miller's successful 'not guilty' plea would be a sore spot for years. It made him hate the whole bloody system all over again. Fucking lawyers.

A sharp knocking at the door shook him out of his musings. Startled, he turned to find that Tess was standing there waiting at the doorstep. "Bloody woman," he muttered under his breath, and flung open the door. "You did notice it's raining out, right?"

"Yes, which is why I'm coming in," she answered shortly, stepping past him and into the small living room. She immediately noticed that the Sandbrook map was gone and turned to look at him with a raised brow. "Well, you didn't waste any time cleaning up."

He grunted as he leaned against the door, hands in his pockets. "No reason to leave it there."

"No," she agreed slowly. "I suppose not." She was still looking at the wall, though, as if imagining it all still hanging up but finally she shook herself and turned to look at him. "I just came over to tell you that the Ashworth's and Ricky are being taken to London for their wait to a trial as we speak." Her expression was impassive as she gazed at him but he had been married too long with her to not be able to tell when she was looking for a fight. He waited silently, knowing she would address it sooner rather than later.

"I heard your conversation with Claire, from the interrogation room," she said coolly. "I must admit, Ellie Miller certainly asked the question I want answered; was there any truth to Claire's allegations that you slept with her?"

He probably should have been stunned that his ex-wife of fourteen years would have to ask him that, but he wasn't. He only felt irritated. And tired.

He groaned, tilting his head back. "What is it with you women?" he complained to the air before glaring at her. "No, Tess, I never slept with Claire Ripley. She was spinning lies and twisting facts as usual."

"Which were?"

Damn it, he needed to work on keeping his mouth shut. He blamed Miller's insistent gabbing, she was rubbing off on him. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "She had an abortion like she said she did," he explained quietly, "shortly after the case fell apart in court." _After you lost the evidence we needed to put Lee away._ "I stayed with her in the clinic ward just so she wasn't alone."

Tess blinked, the only sign she was surprised by the explanation. "I thought she'd made up you telling Lee she was pregnant as a way to reflect badly on you," she said mildly.

He still heard the jab. "Don't start," he growled. "She'd pissed me off one too many times and I knew it would drive a wedge between her and Lee."

He expected Tess to respond in her vaguely-insulting way to mock him, but to his surprise honest disappointment graced her face. "It's not like you to do something like that, Alec."

He was on the defensive but was out of sorts, thoroughly taken aback by her stance. He would have liked it better if she was her usual sarcastic self. "People change," he answered shortly, knowing how cliché that sounded; but it was true. "You haven't been around, Tess."

The disappointment didn't leave her expression. It made him angry. "Don't you dare stand there and say you expected better," he snapped. "It'd be pretty hypocritical of you because we haven't shared a house in three years and you still live with Dave—"

"I loved you because you were a decent man, Alec."

Tess's quiet reply stopped him short and he could only stare at her. She shifted uncomfortably but did not back down from his gaze. "You're a good man, Alec," she said, repeating her words from the day of his pacemaker surgery. Now they held a lot more weight. "You never resorted to such blatant manipulations. You were never so arrogant."

" _You're_ calling _me_ arrogant?" His voice had creeped up an octave with his indignation.

"I've always been arrogant," Tess said with a shrug. "But you never were."

How was it that she always found ways of bringing his ego down? He wondered briefly what a nightmare it would be if his ex-wife ever ganged up with Miller. But he realized, looking back, just how right she was saying it. He never had acted that way before; it had been Sandbrook that had brought out the worst in him.

He had been right when he'd told Miller that Sandbrook was damaging.

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Tess knew that her words had hit home when she saw his shoulders sag. A tiny part of her was honestly regretful that she had brought him down so far but the rest of her had known he needed to hear it.

She knew, after all, that in this argument she was entirely in the right.

It had always been Alec Hardy's tempered humbleness that had made her love him, going hand in hand with his honest wish for justice. To hear the taped conversations of Claire's and Lee's had caused her to pause in dismay. His anger she was familiar with, yes, but not the dangerously prevalent self-confidence.

"I know what Sandbrook did to you. I know what it did to us—"

He was hurt enough to lash out. His lip curled in a familiar sneer of angry disbelief. " _Please_. Don't give me your shit that it was Sandbrook that broke us up! You were with Dave months before! It was just Sandbrook that exposed it."

How did he know that? She almost let her iron control slip, almost gaped at him in open shame; but he was a police officer, he knew how to bluff. It was very likely he was only guessing at the truth to catch her in it. She kept her face carefully neutral but she couldn't help but agree with him. Tess had secretly broken apart their marriage months before Sandbrook had become a crime scene. It was just easier to blame the case.

It still broke her heart to know that, in some way, she had broken him.

She could remember the night that the locket had been stolen from her car ( _'when you were shagging Dave while we were still married'_ ) and she'd had to come clean about why she had been in the hotel in the first place. It had been the worst moment in her life watching the shocked anger on his face crumble to horrified betrayal.

He hadn't cried. Not in front of her.

She hadn't been able to hide her relief, however, when she discovered he had taken the blame of losing the pendant for her. She was still glad that he had done it but it was tempered by time now. Things had changed.

"You're right," she said quietly, if only to assuage her remaining guilt. "It was my fault. I was the one who cheated. Not you."

The pain in his expression didn't lessen. "That doesn't help us now."

Damn him. She tried to tamp down on her irritation. "What will, then?" she asked, a mite sharply.

He was silent for so long she was ready to shake her head and leave, rain be damned; but then he swallowed and said, "Going back and doing it all over again. From day one. Being there for you. For Daisy. I wasn't there enough, I know that. If I could do it over again I would."

She sighed. He was genuine, she could see that. And in some odd way she did miss him. "Daisy's right, you are soppy." She was touched by his answer, though, precisely the one she had been wanting to hear and that made her feel surprisingly playful. She stepped closer, deliberately making herself sound like one of those awful soap opera women. "Maybe that's why I fell in love with you."

He flushed, clearly seen even beneath his beard; he had always been too light-skinned to hide when he did. He straightened off the door. "Stop it." He took a step away, then another, heading along the way of the wall that had held the map. Grinning now, Tess followed after him, delighted by how flustered he'd suddenly become. She had forgotten how shy he could be.

"Oh come on, Alec, you know it's true—"

"Tess, it's not the time for this—"

"It's never 'the time'," she said smoothly, following him. Very near the bedroom now. She suspected he didn't realize which direction he was going. It was surprising how easily they had slipped into their old gentle sniping. He gestured vaguely at the open air, half-heartedly looking for an excuse.

"You have to be getting back to Sandbrook and I have to pack—"

"We're in your house," she interrupted. "In your bedroom."

His knees hit the edge of the mattress as soon as she spoke the last word and he barely caught himself as he fell across the bed, wide-eyed and still very red.

She smiled, coy. "Think your pacemaker will hold up?" she asked him dryly.

"I bloody well hope so," he muttered, then realized what he'd just said. He squirmed. "No! I dunno, Tess, the doctor—"

"Since when have you ever listened to the doctor's orders?"

A beat. "Fine, alright, never! I've never listened to the doctor's orders before."

He was definitely flustered but she could still tell he was excited. "You were the one a few days ago who said you wanted to shag me." She was playing with the lower buttons of his shirt, gently pulling it from where he had tucked it into his pants. Teasing.

"Tess," he practically whined, unable to himself; he shifted closer, all thoughts of his half-hearted escape forgotten. It had been far too long since he'd been to bed with someone. She hadn't seen him this aroused in years—and of course that only made her want to tease him more. He wanted this, fine; but she was going to make him work for it first.

"You're still healing, Alec," she told him smoothly. She stroked lower and laughed when it was enough to make him jerk.

" _Tess_!" Yes, definitely a squeak to his voice now.

"Alec," she retorted gently, not bothering to hide her amusement now.

He glared up at her, knowing what her game was—but he knew how to beat her at it; he snaked out a hand and grasped her wrist, pulling her down on top of him. She barely had time to gasp before his lips were on hers, effectively swallowing up any noise of protest she could decide to make. He pinned her arms with his when she half-heartedly raised them, half on top of her now as he sought out the spots he remembered she loved. She responded in kind, guiding him, shivering when his beard tickled her. He was playing with her shirt, pulling at her collar as he trailed his mouth down her neck—

The doorbell rang. Both of them froze mid-touch, caught entirely out of sorts and their mood effectively ruined. Alec groaned and hid his face in the pillow beside a very amused Tess.

" _Shit_."

Tess giggled, feeling a hot blush spread over her face, thoroughly enjoying her ex-husband's horrible luck, but also a bit disappointed.

The doorbell rang again, a little more insistently this time, and with another muttered curse Alec hauled himself to his feet, hastily tucking his shirt in while making his way to the door. His hair was still heavily mussed and Tess was pleased to see that the faint flush was still coloring his face, openly watching him walk. She had forgotten, too, the faint swing to his hips when he moved.

Briefly she wondered who it was at the door but then she heard it creak open. "Miller."

 _Really_ shit. Suddenly irritated, Tess stood. What was Ellie Miller doing here?

"You don't ever answer your phone, do you?" she heard the other woman ask irritably. "I've tried to call you twice!"

Tess quickly glanced at his phone sitting innocently beside the bed and saw that, sure enough, the screen was flashing with missed calls.

"What do you want, Miller?" His voice had softened marginally. To most it wouldn't have sounded like it but Tess knew him well enough to notice. She straightened her own shirt and made sure she was as impeccably neat as she always was. Her hair had become a mess.

"I wanted to bring the Sandbrook information in with you. They've said all they need is that and they can close the case completely now. Did you know that the Ashworth's and Ricky have been sent to London?"

"I thought you were meeting Beth?"

"I did."

A beat. "I've heard about the Ashworth's and Ricky, yeah."

"Wow, that was fast. That must have been why you weren't answering your phone. Who told y—"

"I told him," Tess interrupted, walking around the corner of the doorway and into sight. She had double and triple checked that her appearance was perfect and raised a cool eyebrow in the other woman's direction. "Nice work with the case. He demanded you specifically, you know. To sit in with him during the interrogations."

"Tess," Alec hissed, turning to glare at her. Ellie was looking between them, taken aback by the information; maybe even a little pleased, Tess noticed carefully. He turned back to Ellie. "Go on outside, I'll be out with the stuff in a minute." He barely gave her time to respond before he shut the door closed again and turned to Tess with angry exasperation. "Really?" he demanded.

Tess stiffened. "You're very close to her, Alec."

His jaw clenched. "Bullshit. We've known each other less than a year. She can barely stand me still." But it was a lie and they both knew it. He looked her up and down. "Are you _jealous_?"

"Absolutely not," she lied coldly. "Just wondering why my ex-husband is so eager to work alongside another woman after the night you and I had a couple of days ago."

At any other time he would have responded in a sarcastic way but the heated moment they had shared together just a moment before and the mentioned night tempered his response. He took a step closer. "If I remember correctly, it's _you_ I was about to shag, not Miller."

Touché. He hadn't answered her remark but it was an answer she was pleased to hear. "You'll be coming back to Sandbrook, then? To Daisy?"

He looked her straight in the eye. "If you'll have me. And I'm not meaning as a short-term thing, Tess," he warned her.

Tess sighed. "Dave didn't work out anyway," she finally admitted quietly, looking at her feet. _Finally_ the truth was told.

He was stunned silent again, staring at her. "What?"

She didn't know whether she was making the right decision admitting the truth but she couldn't stop now. She didn't look up. "Sandbrook broke you and me apart but it also strained Dave and I," she explained quietly. "We just didn't know it until months later. We didn't last. Dave transferred to another police force and I haven't seen or heard from him since."

A mix of hurt and hope was warring over his expression. "Why didn't you tell me before?"

She shook her head. "I didn't want you to know that I'd—that I'd made a mistake. And Dave was a mistake, I know that now. Please, come back to Sandbrook. To me and Daisy. Or like you said, we can bring Daisy down here until we can get you settled back in, show her the beach."

His eyes had lit up with the mention of their daughter. "Does Daisy know anything about this? About you and Dave, and why you two-?"

"Absolutely not," Tess said firmly.

"Good." He glanced back briefly at the door where they could see Ellie pacing restlessly back and forth, thinking. "Alright. I'll be back in Sandbrook in a day or so. Let me gather up my things."

Tess nodded. "She'll be pleased. She's missed you, even if she hasn't returned your phone calls." She smirked as she looked out. "I'll leave you to yournot-friend, then. I'll give Daisy a ring, tell her you're coming home."

She slipped past him out the front door, leaving Ellie looking curiously at her back. The rain had lessened to a sprinkle and it was with a lighter heart that Tess called a cab to take her to the Broadchurch police quarters to grab her belongings.

It would be tough, she knew, starting over with Alec. They had been apart for several years now and she knew that he had been hurt by her. Hopefully with Sandbrook solved they could begin again.

She was determined to get it right this time.

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A/N: Slightly AUish ending because I've got Alec and Tess officially together again, but it's not entirely out of 'canon' reality because all of E8 plays out the way it does in the actual show. Hope you enjoyed!


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